Episode 51

Why Bad Comfort Hurts

November 20, 2019

ep. 51

SHOW NOTES

Have you ever experienced someone that tries to comfort you but instead hurts you, perhaps deeply? Their intentions were, most likely, all well and good but you were left quite the opposite.

Let us know about it so we can groan with you. Let us know if you knew it hurt but aren’t sure why. Let us know simply to get it off your chest and not be alone. 

  • What did you eat good or bad this week?
    • Jay – Teriyaki chicken
    • Eric – Jay’s Chicken Stromboli
    • Brian – Jay’s practice chicken soup
  • What did you do this week?
    • Jay – lots of lunches with people who need council
    • Eric – Saw Ford v Ferrari
    • Brian – had a moment where all of the emotional needs gets real
  • Focus Topic – Why Bad Comfort Hurts
    • Marilyn – I had a young son who had some medical problems & eventually an amputation. I was told by a friend that I didnt believe enough or his leg would grow back. Guilt sometimes is unbearable.
    • Tara – Standing on the steps outside the church of my mothers funeral a woman came through the receiving line and told me she gained 20 lbs when her mom died so I should “be careful”. 😑😑😑. I think she was trying to lighten (pun not intended) the mood but it was so out of place I almost fell over.
    • Heidi – Suffering from a migraine and someone told me, you need to pray more then you wont have them anymore.
    • Rebecca – “You could be disabled like my son.” -my crazy family member, telling me how racism doesn’t exist and that I don’t know how good I have it.
    • Karen – This isn’t anything that’s that bad but it’s hurtful when you deal with depression and someone tells you to “just cheer up”
      • Lisa Ann  – I was often told, “there’s other people that have it so much worse”
    • Sally – We had a full term stillborn son. After a couple of months a woman at the church we were attending told me “it’s time you get over this”
    • Marilyn – I had a young son who had some medical problems & eventually an amputation. I was told by a friend that I didnt believe enough or his leg would grow back. Guilt sometimes is unbearable.
    • Heidi – One of the most hurtful one was, “you cant have kids because God is punishing you” from a close family member.
    • Patricia – I had a person tell me ‘I know just how you are feeling’ while we were standing in the funeral home, in front of my dad’s casket. Maybe they did know, maybe not, but I remember bring numbed by their comment. It was a defining moment that put a shroud over our relationship to this day
    • Tina – After my transplant, there was complications and I ended up back in the hospital. I was at this point in the hospital for almost a month and my spirits was very low. I had “friends” come to visit and cheer me up. I was told I need knock it off and stopping acting like a brat , and should just be thankful for the second chance, this is not the way a person who got a second chance should be acting …Not only did this not help me emotionally it made it worse because now I was told I wasn’t being thankful for my gift which was the furthest from the truth….it made me feel on top of every I was disappointing my donor..
  • Do Better
  • Can’t Do Better

 

 

 

THE CREW

Jay Mitlo

Jay Mitlo

Brian Herr

Brian Herr

Eric Hammond

Eric Hammond

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