April 20, 2022
Welcome everyone and pull up a seat at the table. It’s Lunchtime in Rome. Tonight is episode 153 entitled “Affection.” Do you love a hug? Do you need your loved ones to say, “I love you” every time you hang up the phone? How much do you need affection? Where did it come from? Did you always get it? Have you never had it? What do you do when you don’t get that need met?
- What is it?
- Expressing care and closeness through physical touch; saying “I love you” or “I care about you.”
- This is both physical and verbal.
- What causes it?
- Having it met constantly as a child
- NOT having it met as a child
- How is it met?
- Verbal expressions
- Written expressions – notes, cards, texts, posts
- General – Pounds, high fives, “polite” hugs, European kisses
- Intimate – warm embrace hugs, kissing, sex
- How is it not met/how are we hurt by not receiving it
- Weaponized intentional absence of it verbally
- Weaponized intentional absence of it sexually
- Giving it to others
- Stopping short
- How do we “steal” or misuse it?
- Giving it when we want it.
- Teasing about it.
- “Rough housing” or physical play.
- Aggressive/harmful demands/manipulations.
- Getting it from others
- Physical affairs
- Emotional affairs
- When we do not receive affection, how are we hurt?
- Fear – not believing we can ask for it
- The belief that one’s actions have caused the lack of affection
- The feeling that one’s asking for affection has caused it to not happen
- Self Condemnation
- The feeling that one is not worthy of affection as a person
- The feeling that one is not worthy of affection physically
- Anger – not being able to see why the other can’t meet your need for affection