Episode 155

Bad Patterns in Relationships Part 2

May 4, 2022

ep. 155

SHOW NOTES

Welcome everyone and pull up a seat at the table. It’s Lunchtime in Rome.  Tonight is episode 155 entitled “Bad Patterns in Relationships 2 – The Solution.”  Last week in episode 154 we talked about bad patterns that we have in relationships.  It happens when you have the same fight over and over again with different details, but it’s basically the same fight.

This week we will equip you with all that it takes to break that negative pattern and properly heal hurts and navigate disagreements.

Pull up a chair at the table and join us!

 

How to break the cycle of bad patterns

 

  1. Seek God’s input on the matter 
    • How does He feel about what you’ve done?
    • How does He feel for the other person?
    • Listen!!
  2. Understand where the hurts go and be mindful/loving with that knowledge
    • Avoid directing anger/fear AT the other person
    • Try not to have your guilt/self condemnation cloud the truth
  3. What are their hurts, what needs were not met or taken from them?
    • How do you like that need to be met?
    • How can you meet their need while your need(s) are also met?
  4. Realize that meeting another’s needs is loving them
  5. Be aware of your and their emotional needs (as compared to the hurts)?
    • Commit to being OHV
    • Be very careful if THIS has been a problem
    • If both people are not committed to this, many future hurts will be created
  6. Heal all hurts
    • Outside – Heal old wounds
      • Attach comfort one on one
      • Have others comfort if needed
      • Seek outside counsel in navigating this if neccesary
    • Inside – Confess, Express, Understand, Forgive
  7. Seek WISE counsel
    • An outside perspective is valuable
    • Do not seek an echo chamber
    • Do not simply vent/gossip/disrespect
  8. What’s next?
    • Replace bad patterns with good
      • Regular check-ins in regards to needs and hurts
      • Spending time building the relationship outside of needs and conflict
    • Allow for grace within the relationship

THE CREW

Jay Mitlo

Jay Mitlo

Brian Herr

Brian Herr

Eric Hammond

Eric Hammond

Chris Davidson

Chris Davidson

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